For me, it still comes down to my philosophy that there is no single soul mate for someone. There is no perfect match. People are conflicted and flippant, so to think that there's one person that can meet all that we want seems, well, impossible.
Rather I always believed that there are maybe a hundred or so "ones" out there - the ones that you can spend the rest of your lives together in happiness, the one's who can make you smile day-in, day-out. The one's that can touch your heart.
But the chance of meeting these "one's" are still pretty slim. You may never meet one, you may meet one (and think it's your soul mate) or you may be lucky enough to meet a few.
Looking back, I have to say that I've been lucky to meet probably a few. The one that I marry may very well not be the one, but there's so much of her that I appreciate that she is one of those that have become "one", but not a natural "one" if that makes sense.
The other two would have to be Ja- and Je-...coincidentally both with J's (never thought of that). Yet the two are so different.
With Ja-, I could imagine myself traveling the world, discussing, debating, trying all sorts of things and challenging each other. We would have our own lives as well and it would just be a very fulfilling relationship on most fronts, with a lot of conversation.
With Je-, since we can barely communicate anyway, it seems I can see myself just staying in one place and doing whatever. Sitting at home on the couch all day - walk in a market the whole afternoon, lay by a swimming pool for a morning, watch the sunset...I guess you can say, she calms me.
But I could never see their traits combined in one. And there are other traits from people that I can see myself connecting with.
Will I be unfortunate enough to meet another one of the "ones"? I always hope so, but also know the torment of meeting one when you cannot be together. Maybe that's part of what makes them the "one".
And maybe, just maybe, there is actually that one soul mate out there, but just that most of us are never lucky enough to meet.
But for now, I count my blessings for the ones that I have met. As heartwrenching as it may be at times.
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